It's Okay to be Bitter

For a long time I was labeled as a bitter woman. I guess the way I used to talk about the opposite sex always sounded...well, negative. I never thought I was that hard on them, but even my female friends used to think I had a chip on my shoulder. Well, maybe they were all right. However, even if they were right, why is it so bad to be a bitter woman from time to time?

Bitterness to me is like a purging experience. It allows you to release all of the frustration that is caused by the anguish of rejection, the disappointments of Mr. Right turning out to be Totally Mr. Wrong, or the realization of "He's Just Not That Into You." We all experience this, we all become frustrated by bad timing, so why can't we all experience bitterness?

Well, if you ask me, we can. Bitterness is a recognition of the bad past but it should also be the anticipation of a hopeful future. In life we have to go through the bad experiences in order to appreciate the good ones. I used to think that way of thinking was a load of crap but in reality, it is so very true. The only problem is that we should not dwell in the bad experiences, only recognize them for the learning lessons that they are. That is the problem with some bitter people. They become so complacent in that negative state to the point where they don't even believe the positive will exist. Life is full of twists and turns, it's not always going to be easy, if you can accept that then you can enjoy the ride. So, in all, bitterness is perfectly fine, just in small portions.

Now don't get my wrong, bitterness is not just a female trait. I've met plenty of bitter men in my life, especially one's with emotional baggage from bad relationships. Men complain about the lack of good women just as much as women complain about the lack of good men. It seems like the good men are missing the good women because the bad men and women are perpetrators who pose as good people. It's a very complex situation that will never become simple. It takes a lot of time to find that good match, but believing you will find that person is half the battle.

Bitterness however should not alter your behavior when it comes to relationships with the opposite sex. In other words, don't fall in to the trap that most bitter people fall victim to, the endless pit of empty relationships. Becoming a ho is not the remedy for a time of unhappiness (I'm talking to males and females because both sexes tend to do this). If you take this route, you're letting your bitterness get the best of you, and that's not good. Bitterness should be a state of being at a particular time in your life, not a lifestyle.

Therefore, bitterness is fine but only in small portions. Those bad experiences are only helping you to narrow down your choices more and more. They are just learning experiences that everyone has, you just have to use those situations wisely.